Pure Hell

I really dont know what to do with this one. i got to the middle and really couldnt write what i wanted to write, so if you have any give me suggestions!!


This started out as a game.
Something fun to fill up an afternoon,
to keep us from dying of boredom on a hot summer day.

When this hell started, it was fun:
Looking for volcanic rocks in my back yard,
an innocent nine-year-old
trying to have fun with her best friend.
At that time I had not the slightest clue
about this mental trap that awaited me.

“Hey, did your dad finish building that apartment? Lets go check it out!!”

and I’d like to say I fought back.
and I’d like to say I survived, or came back unharmed

But that would be lying.

All I could do
was close my eyes
Close my eyes so tight I couldn’t see him,
and hope, by some miracle,
that he wouldn’t see me either-
And that I could just slip away,
off the face of this disgusting planet,
and never have to go back to life,
to anything,
just die right there.

It wasn’t until four years later that I could tell someone, anyone, what happened that day.
The day my soul died,

The day I stopped smiling.